Next to Faith No More, Alice In Chains is one of my favorite bands ever. Aside from the few songs on their Nothing Safe: Best of the Boxalbum, these guys haven’t put out new music since 1995’s self-titled Alice In Chains album.
Then Layne Staley died, and I figured AIC would never again be.
Fortunately, I was wrong. With the addition of their new vocalist, William DuVall, AIC is back!
The new video was just released. Matt Murphy just brought it to my attention, and I’m super-pumped. In the event that the video is taken down from MySpace because of the boobs content, do yourself a favor and go to the band’s website, www.aliceinchains.com to check out “A Looking In View,” AIC’s first single from their forthcoming album, Black Gives Way To Blue
July 7, 2009 @ 10:05 am
· Filed under Humor, Videos
At some point in the next week, I’ll really write something. For now, here is some more YouTube Funny. I’ve decided that Reckless Tortugais my new favorite comedy troupe.
June 8, 2009 @ 11:11 am
· Filed under Humor, Videos
It’s no secret. I have bladder issues. I have to urinate frequently. Like way frequently.
It’s not that I have a small bladder. I used to think this was the case, but then I realized that for the first time in my life I was wrong…ish.
I drink tons of liquid, and for the most part, all the liquid is a diuretic. Soda, coffee….soda. Some water when Meggie nags me. When I used to drink, the amount of beer I drank quickly proved the old adage that “you only rent beer.” It got to be so bad that as I sat in my lonely apartment guzzling beer after 40 after beer after 40 that I would use the empty 40 bottles to piss in so that I didn’t have to make so many trips to the bathroom. By the way, if you ever find the need to piss into a 40 bottle, choose Hurricane bottles over the others. The wide mouth on The Natural Disaster really reduces stray urine from spraying on your hands and pets. On a side note, you know how urine kind of looks like beer? I have a funny story about that….
So I have to piss regularly and it’s not that my bladder is too small. I think I just have a really entitled bladder. If my bladder were a public figure, it would be Paris Hilton. Totally undisciplined and maybe even a bit retarded. Always getting what it wants. And what it wants is to pee all the time. Right now. Be right back.
Meggie nagged me incessantly, mainly because the pause button on our DVD remote has been worn down from the amount of times I’ve asked, “Would you mind pushing pause, Toots? Daddy’s gotta drain his lizard again.” Finally I caved and agreed to tell my doctor.
And I told him.
And he prescribed DetrolLA to me.
Great. I don’t mind telling people I’m on crazy pills. But bitchy bladder pills? Fuck!
Christine Brown has a good job, a great boyfriend, and a bright future. But in three days, she’s going to hell.
Reasons to see this movie:
You like horror
You like Sam Raimi
You like throwbacks to Evil Dead 1 & 2.
You like old denture-wearing gypsy hags tormenting, beating the shit out of/vomiting bugs on young, blond damsels in distress.
Reasons not to see this movie:
You don’t like any of the aformentioned badassery.
You have a problem seeing kittens sacrificed and later puked up by a demon.
This movie was so much fun. It retained the campiness, humor and crudeness of Evil Dead and Army of Darkness. But it also brought the horror. Like real horror. Go check it.
When I was in the 8th grade, I picked up a copy of White Zombie’s La Sexorcista: Devil Music Volume 1. Led by techno-acid-horror-kitsch-retro-art singer, Rob Zombie, it was a take on rock I hadn’t heard before. I still love that album and all other Rob Zombie music projects that followed.
When I was 25, I watched House of 1,000 Corpses and The Devil’s Rejects back-to-back under some very strange, sweaty circumstances. *giggity* When I look back on that evening, the circumstances are condemnable at least. However, the movies are not. 1,000 Corpses and Rejects raised the bar for the slasher flick in a way that Hostel and Saw tried at but failed. They played on the basic vulnerable “this could happen to anyone at any time under any circumstance” horror that the original Texas Chainsaw Massacre parlayed. That’s how I saw it anyway. Plus, Hostel was retarded as shit and the Saw series became too formulaic. I’ll take Otis Driftwood quoting Charles Manson and wearing your face over Jigsaw the handicapped sadist any day.
Anyway. Rob Zombie proved (especially with The Devil’s Rejects) that horror is still alive and well if dealt with properly.
Then Zombie did something I wasn’t sure I approved of. He sought to remake Halloween. What the hell, right? I learned about this at the same time that there were talks of remaking Cronenberg’s The Fly (and don’t say it’s a remake of the Vincent Price film, or I will…I don’t know…snap your arm in an arm wrestling match).
Okay, I didn’t just disapprove. I was pissed. Great! They’re remaking The Fly, possibly my favorite horror movie of all time, and now Rob Zombie is remaking Halloween. Fucking great, Rob. Now I have to hate you.
He totally passed, though. What an amazing job. He didn’t just “re-shoot” Halloween like Psycho was reshot but with color in the late 90s. Instead, he paid tribute to the original, reinventing the story from a different and brilliantly shocking angle. A true reimaging. Both Halloweens are now seperate and wonderful entities.
Halloween was amazing. It helped sweeten the soured taste in my mouth of all of the Ringesque movies that promised so much but delivered nothing.
And now, Halloween II is set to chop into the minds of pop horror buffs once again. August ‘09, putos. I am so excited about this. I watched the preview, and I am already sold.
I’m not even second guessing the man again. A few years ago I said that Rob Zombie may singlehandedly bring back horror. I’m going to go ahead and retract that statement, especially since Sam Raimi of Evil Dead fame just unleashed Drag Me to Hell. But I think Rob Zombie is going to be a MAJOR driving force in the reinvention of good horror.
“This movie is drenched in more blood than me when I went down on that hemophiliac girl on the rag. While wearing a razor blade attachment on my tongue.”
That’s what I would say if I was the marketing manager for this film and had to sum it up for the viewers.
Wow.
Um.
Yeah, wow.
Vampire Girl Versus Frankenstein Girl is exactly why Japan is still the word’s foremost leader in splatter horror. I don’t even know what this movie is about, and frankly, I don’t care. I just know that I want to watch it. Now.
