The Mystery of The Room Store Lady
A few years ago, Meggie and I were watching TV when we saw The Room Store commercial:
“That lady is so fucking weird looking.”
Meggie agreed. “Yeah and something tells me she is a freak in the sack.”
And over the next few years, every time I saw a Room Store commercial I wondered about Room Store lady. Depending on my mood, I found Room Store lady to be creepy, “interesting-looking,” and at times, I even found myself sexually attracted to her. Of course, that was before I was married. Now that I am married, I NEVER think about things like banging the Room Store lady.
Here are some other things I have thought about when I saw her:
She’s a lesbian.
She is asexual.
She’s a dominatrix/sexual deviant.
She is an elf/goblin.
She is a school teacher.
She is either 20-something or 40-something.
She is a stretched out primordial dwarf.
She is Janine Melnitz from The Ghostbusters.
Last night, I saw a Room Store commercial, and I decided to get to the bottom of all of this and find out who The Room Store lady is. I turned to the old obsession-enforcer, the word wide Interwebs.
Here’s what I found out:
The Room Store lady’s real name is Kristen Swanson, and along with being the spokeself (or spokesgoblin, depending on my mood), she is also the star in a “Taming of the Shrew”-inspired YouTube short called “Tamed”:
Yeah.
Meggie was right, she is a total freak:
At about 4:50 into “Tamed,” she says, “We are going to have rough sex, damn it and you are going to like it.”
I’m wondering what I am going to think next time a Room Store Commercial airs…
- David C. Garcia,
Not a stalker, just really obsessive
Anna Dos Said,
April 10, 2009 @ 10:08 am
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEW goblin porn! suprisingly large jugs for a supernatural critter, though…
Katherine Said,
April 10, 2009 @ 7:51 pm
OMG. She creeps me out too! I always have to mute the TV when her commercials come on. Does The Room Store know about her side gigs?
Tom the Texan Said,
April 20, 2009 @ 5:21 pm
i have seen this commerical over and over; i have a deep intense passion for redheads; she looks cute;
i wish i could have been the male lead in that video!
dont judge a book by its cover;
she may well be the most outstanding lady ever;
David C. Garcia Said,
April 20, 2009 @ 10:43 pm
Go get her, Tom. She lives in VA.
Bob Said,
July 14, 2009 @ 6:58 am
I dunno, I’d tap that lilly white ass, and bust a nut all over dem tittays and cute lil face.
Bob Said,
July 14, 2009 @ 7:04 am
The girl, that is…not the guy.
John Said,
July 22, 2009 @ 5:17 am
Think its freaky that the spokes woman for a national chain is in a soft porn youtube video? Well hold on to your panties. According to the imbd she also works as a TUTOR ON MOVIE SETS! Thats right, our rough sex girl works with kids! Someone alert the authorities!
She is hot though.
John Said,
July 22, 2009 @ 5:20 am
I totally missed your comment about her being a school teacher first time I read your blog. Man you are good!
boy_blu Said,
September 10, 2009 @ 2:47 pm
I think the lady is just sexy as hell, and watching the You Tube film confirms it. Teacher, tutor or whatever.
Charles Said,
September 12, 2009 @ 6:16 pm
Gosh, and all this time the Mrs. and I thought she was related in some way to Sanduy Duncan. I mean, she *sounds* a bit like her, and *looks* a bit like her, and is perky, perky, perky, like her too, isn’t she?
joe Said,
September 13, 2009 @ 7:56 pm
is she related to Sandy Duncan?
rich deermeat Said,
September 17, 2009 @ 7:20 am
My god, there is something wrong with me. I find her sexy as hell. She is damn hot!!!!!!
Mikdee Said,
October 17, 2009 @ 4:13 am
We have always called her “The Chicken Lady” - one of these commercials I swear she is going to crow and lay an egg.
snake Said,
October 31, 2009 @ 8:56 pm
Yes. I thought I was the only one. So my desire for this woman isn’t all that unhealthy. I so want to bang her!
joe doakes Said,
November 25, 2009 @ 10:09 pm
You should have seen the Richmond SPCA commercial she did back in late 2004 that apparently aired once and only once by mistake one Fall night on Pox 35 TV here….neutering your male pooch usually isn’t referred to as “cutting them off”
Dan Said,
December 7, 2009 @ 3:55 am
How ever did you find this? I have been wondering who she was for years and nobody seemed to know. She is hot. I would bang the hell out of her.
Dan Said,
December 7, 2009 @ 4:18 am
Is there any contact information for her, just wondering.
Zonker Said,
January 18, 2010 @ 4:48 pm
She is not Janine Melnitz from The Ghostbusters. That character was played by Annie Potts of Designing Women fame. I could not find her on IMDB. So, other than the You Tube short and the Room Store commercial I don’t know what else she has done. She is a bit querky and does look a bit like Sandy Duncan.
Damien Creaton Said,
February 10, 2010 @ 9:13 pm
OMG! I’ve always fantasized about the Roomstore Lady. She is so “girl next door” That mousy faced neighbor with the crazy libido! She just wants to do the nasty all day long. I want her big time!
Marty Said,
February 12, 2010 @ 4:43 am
Thank you, you’ve answered a question about the chicken lady that I’ve had for quite some time!
Brad Said,
February 17, 2010 @ 4:14 pm
Where did “Tamed” go on YouTube? I saw it years ago and it’s gone now.
Blue Said,
February 19, 2010 @ 1:12 pm
She is hot… The last commercial she was sorta jumping up and down and those tatas were flopping… I was like I bet she’s a screamer in the bed… I love screamers…
Tizzy Said,
March 30, 2010 @ 7:54 pm
I’m glad to c that I’m not the only one attracted to her. She doesn’t have ur typical Hollywood look & I love that. Hey Roomstore goddess. Call me;)
Claude Said,
April 1, 2010 @ 4:32 pm
ROFFLE! Glad I’m not the only one intrigued by the oddity that is the Roomstore Lady. A google search paid off.
“Elf” never really crossed my mind, though that’s probably because my uncle always calls her Peter Pan.