I just finished reading Michael Ian Black’s new (and first) book, My Custom Van: And 50 Other Mind-Blowing Essays that Will Blow Your Mind All Over Your Face. Wow. It is absolutely hilarious. Here’s the insert description:
Get ready for the read of your life. Never before has a single book combined awesome vans, unicorns, Billy Joel, and erotic fiction in such a potent combination. A writing tour de force? Perhaps. A reading experience that will sear itself into your consciousness like a red-hot branding iron? Without question.
Comedian and basic cable superstar Michael Ian Black unleashes the full fury of his astonishing intellect in this collection of short comic essays. My Custom Van is a no-holds-barred assault to the funny bone that will literally beat you into submission with hilarity*.
How did he do it? How did he create such a fine anthology? Answer: With love. Michael opened his heart and used the magical power of love to write more than fifty thought-provoking essays like, “Why I Used a Day-GloMagic Marker to Color My Dick Yellow,” and “An Open Letter to the Hair Stylist Who Somehow Convinced Me to Get a Perm When I Was in Sixth Grade.”
Maybe you think love is not a substitute for “good writing skills” and “spell check.” Bull pucky! When it comes to writing books, love is the most powerful word processor of all.
Sounds pretty great, right? And yet…something is still holding you back from paying the full purchase price of this book. What is it? Perhaps you secretly believe you do not deserve a book this good. Nonsense — you deserve this book and so much more. In fact, if Michael could have written you all the stars in the sky, that’s what he would have done. But he couldn’t do that, due to his lack of knowledge in the area of astronomy. So he wrote this book instead.
And this flap copy.
Enjoy.
* Michael Ian Black is not responsible for any actual injuries caused by reading this book.
As I read this book, I found myself getting more and more jealous. If I had half of the “funny” Michael Ian Black has, I would be half as funny as he is. After offering a forward to his book by Abraham Lincoln, MIB offers up his first essay, “What I Would Be Thinking if I Were Billy Joel Driving to a Holiday Party Where I Knew there was Going to be a Piano.” Then there are 49 mostly side-splitting essays. A handful of the essays didn’t really do it for me, but they were definitely outweighed by the majority of the hilarity contained in the book
I do wonder if Michael Ian Black has been reading my blog. I had gone ahead and titled one of my posts “Ozsome.” He goes ahead and uses the same word in his book. Damnit. I should have trademarked that word.
omg, I started laughing out loud when I read his titles. I’m going over to a friend’s after this, and I texted him and said, “Do me a favor and go get a book for me at the bookstore!”
He says he’s sleeping but I say he’d better do what I want or else he get’s a nice pimp backhand to the FACE.
I will be reading this book to my kids. And by “kids”, of course I mean the drunken homeless guy on 6th street who keeps begging me for crack. “Not until Mommy finishes this page”.