OW!

I like to consider myself the pinnacle of health and awesomeness.

 

Let me rephrase that.  I think I am generally pretty healthy, and I am the pinnacle of awesomeness.  Better.

 

I have never really had any aches and pains.  Sometimes I get “caffeine headaches,” but I can’t remember ever suffering a normal headache, and I certainly have never had any problems with my back or joints…until last night.

 

I took Rowdy out for a walk around the block last night to poop (Rowdy, not me).  When I got back, I experienced a shooting pain through my knee.  It felt like there were fire demons stabbing my knee with millions of knives made from acid and anger.  It was horrible.  My knee hurt for the rest of the night and it has continued through today.

 

I was always perplexed by people’s aches and pain because I never had any.  Now I know.  God I hope I don’t start having knee problems.  First my sports-related injury, and now this?!  All these aches and pains can only mean one thing: I am getting old.  Part of being awesome is not being old.

 

- David C. Garcia

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12 Responses to OW!

  1. Meggie says:

    And you make fun of me when my knees start bothering me. Atleast it’s from all the years I spent dancing on my toes. Not old age. I love you though, and I will gladly push your wheelchair around and took in your flannel blanket lovingly.

  2. Meggie says:

    That’s tuck your blanket in. I don’t know why I typed took. My bad!

  3. I don’t think being Awesome and being Old are mutually exclusive. Mr. Rogers was oldsome. And Hugh Hefner. And…um…Moses?

    b

  4. David C. Garcia says:

    I don’t think Hugh Hefner is awesome. He’s more gross than anything. I’ll give you Mr. Rogers, though. That dude was a straight up badass, right?

  5. Olivia says:

    Medical genius here,

    maybe you have a build up of lactic acid in your joint since you have been taking all the boxing championship titles lately. You should probably try a food/juice detox and chug a lot of water. I know, I know you love diet coke but that shit is so bad for you.

    Thus endith the medical lesson.

    :D

  6. David C. Garcia says:

    Why is it just one knee then? Does all the Diet Coke go to one knee? AHHHHHHHHH!!!!

  7. Katherine says:

    I can kick you in your other knee if that will help.

  8. David C. Garcia says:

    That would not help. That would just make me grumpy and old. Then I would just be Bill O’Reilly.

  9. mom says:

    you have a build up of lactic acid in your knee? Does this mean your knee has to avoid milk?

  10. David C. Garcia says:

    Mom, my knee has been avoiding milk forever. You should see the mess it makes when it has milk.

  11. Short Pants says:

    “I don’t think being Awesome and being Old are mutually exclusive. Mr. Rogers was oldsome. And Hugh Hefner. And…um…Moses?”

    Then why does the who (hypocritically now, admittedly) sing, “Hope I die before I get old?”

  12. Maybe your knee actually needs to be milked.

    b

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